Recently I was really lucky to spend some time with a family friend who teaches classes on communicating kids. Since I am fairly certain my toddler speaks his own language that no one else but other toddlers seem to understand, I was very excited to pick her brain for some tips. I was not disappointed. Her tips were amazing, so naturally, I am sharing! Drumroll please….
- Kids, especially toddlers, are motivated by power and control. Sound a little crazy, I know. But now that I am paying attention, I swear it is true. Whenever my toddler gets frustrated about something, I step back and ask myself what he is seeking – power or control. When he doesn’t want to leave the park? He wants control over his choices. When he wants to do things himself? He wants power. Once I can ascertain his motivations, I can then tailor how I talk to him so I can meet that need. Which leads to…
- Never ask a yes or no question, unless you are prepared for the answer to be no. I used to ask my son to clean up. He would stare at me like I had 6 heads. Which would lead to me continuing to ask him to do the same thing over and over until he threw a fit or I did. (What is the definition of insanity again?) Now, instead of asking him to do such a large task on his own, I ask him if he wants to clean up his trucks or his Legos. When he chooses one (see the first point), I will clean up the toy he didn’t choose. In the end, he usually cleans up almost everything he took out. The difference is, he got to pick what he was doing. Plus, allowing him to clean up in small segments makes the act feel less overwhelming. This works for lots of other instances too. When we are ready to leave the playground, I will ask him if he wants to swing or go down the slide one more time before we leave. He is so focused on his choice that he doesn’t realize we are leaving. Bottom line? Give choices so kids don’t even realize they can refuse.
Making these small changes has made a world of difference in the way I communicate with my son. While it hasn’t alleviated every tantrum, it has definitely noticeably cut them down. And for that, I owe this friend a
glass case of wine.
The internet has a plethora of information for pregnant mamas – some of which is insightful and informative, most of which is garbage I’d encourage you to ignore. Alpha Mom is a site that every mom needs to bookmark. One of my favorite resources for a pregnant mama is Alpha Mom’s Zero to Forty calendar – the most fun week-by-week countdown calendar the internet has to offer.
I always look forward to reading about my weekly pregnancy developments with Alpha Mom’s silly down-to-earth takes on the various indignities and struggles we pregnant mamas face, as well as stats on the growing baby in our bellies. She calls herself your internet BFF guide. And that’s exactly what it is. You will love having her by your side through every step of your pregnancy.
After the big day, don’t forget to check out her Bounce Back guide to help guide you through the world of post-partum recovery. All while getting in a good laugh!
Happy Weekend everyone! Check out some of our favorite links of the week!
My daughter has been blessed with gorgeous, silky blonde hair and ringlet curls… totally unlike my unruly, frizzy mane. That doesn’t mean that on a rainy day she doesn’t end up looking like this:
On humid days, I realize she did in fact inherit my hair.
I began researching conditioners and hair products safe for a toddler, and someone I know recommended Shea Moisture Coconut Hibiscus Moisture Mist. This anti-frizz, moisturizing spray, which is designed for curly hair, is sulfate-free, paraben-free, gluten-free and certified organic.
Did I mention it also works wonders? Now, at the end of her bath, I spray it liberally all over, and our detangling brush glides right through her hair. Her curls stay silky, shiny and controlled through the next day, with no frizz at all. It also smells like heaven. I may have to give it a go on my curls!
Have a little one who is about to start school? If you are not quite sure how to approach the topic, we found an adorable toy for children ages 3 and up called the Pretend & Play School Set that helps kids get excited about school by playing teacher. The set includes 149 supplies such as a grade book, stickers, hall passes, dry-erase board, hand pointer, crayons, double-sided calendar, double-sided map, a working bell and a clock that tracks time. Kids can present lessons, reward their friends with stickers, and fill out report cards to grade their students. This toy is a great way to encourage role playing and pretend play and get kids excited about school. Happy Learning!